Introduction

A child has just lost his best friend suddenly in a car accident. He has become socially withdrawn from family and friends and his grades have gone down. You try to help him through his grief but it takes time-remember children deal with everthing-even death-in concrete and simple terms. Most parents wait until confronted with death to start thinking about how to help their children deal with the grieving process and deal with a loss. There are endless oppotunities to talk about death as a part of life, but most parents ignore these chances trying to protect their children. Your child needs to understand the feelings of confusion and grief associated with death. This webquest provides guidelines to assist children and parents to deal with the grieving process.

The Quest

To find ways to assist children through the grieving process in order to help them deal with death.

The Process and Resources

In this WebQuest you will be working together with a group of students in class. Each group will answer the Task or Quest(ion). As a member of the group you will explore Webpages from people all over the world who care about Children Dealing with Death. Because these are real Webpages we're tapping into, not things made just for schools, the reading level might challenge you. Feel free to use the online Webster dictionary or one in your classroom.

You'll begin with everyone in your group getting some background before dividing into roles where people on your team become experts on one part of the topic.

Phase 1 - Background: Something for Everyone

Use the Internet information linked below to answer the basic questions of who? what? where? when? why? and how?

1. List and describe ways to help a child through the grieving process.
2. What should adults keep in mind when answering a child's questions about death?
3. Find out what the child knows and thinks about death and then provide them with simple honest facts.

• Children and Grief- -Helping a Child Through the Grieving Process - Answers quesions about grieving and how to cope with it.

Phase 2 - Looking Deeper from Different Perspectives

INSTRUCTIONS:

1. Individuals or pairs from your larger WebQuest team will explore one of the roles below.

2. Read through the files linked to your group. If you print out the files, underline the passages that you feel are the most important. If you look at the files on the computer, copy sections you feel are important by dragging the mouse across the passage and copying / pasting it into a word processor or other writing software.

3. Note: Remember to write down or copy/paste the URL of the file you take the passage from so you can quickly go back to it if you need to to prove your point.

4. Be prepared to focus what you've learned into one main opinion that answers the Big Quest(ion) or Task based on what you have learned from the links for your role.

Child

Use the Internet information linked below to answer these questions specifically related to Child:

Question for Kids Art and Poetry Exhibit:
1. What do you feel when looking at these pictures and reading the poetry?
2. Draw or write your own picture/poem/story about your feelings about death?
3. What way do you express your feelings when a loved one dies?

Questions for Kids 2 Kids:
1. What are the benefits of going to a kids support group to help with grieving?
2. What is a peer and how can peer support help with grieving?
3. What has helped you deal with death?
4. How does sharing your feelings with others help you?

Questions for How Children Grieve:
1. Have you experienced guilt about a death and if so what kind?
2. What are some ways you express your fear of death?
3. Give some physical reactions to expressing grief?
4. Explain the meaning of 'grieving goes in cycles throughtout childhood and life?'
5. What are some feelings that you experience when grieving?

• Kids Art and Poetry Exhibit - An exhibition of art and poetry by children who have experienced death or loss of a loved one and have coped by putting their thoughts into words and drawings.
• Kids 2 Kids - E-mail based grief support group between kids dealing with any loss. Includes peer support, games, poetry, stories, art, and talking to other kids.
• How Children Grieve - Site for children which provides information on the grieving process including choices and commonly felt emotions such as guilt, sorrow, anger, and fear in dealing with death.

Parent

Use the Internet information linked below to answer these questions specifically related to Parent:

Questions for Children Dealing With Death:
1. What are some signs of depression that your child may show when dealing with death and what do you do about it?
2. What should you tell your child when they ask you about death?

Questions for Learning to Live Through Loss:
1. Name at least 3 ways you can tell your child that someone has died?
2. What are some facts you need to stress when your child has misconceptions about death?
3. Name and explain some common signs of mourning in children?
4. What are some ways you can help your child heal over the death of a loved one?

Questions for Dealing with Death:
1. What are some normal (ok feelings) that a child may experience dealing with death?
2. What are some important things to remember when expressing death with your child?
3. How have you dealt with experiences of death and how do you show your grief?
4. Why is honesty so important when talking to your child about death?

• Children Dealing With Death - Suggestions to assist parents in explaining the death of a loved one and ways to identify problems associated with the death.
• Learning to Live Through Loss: Helping Children Understand Death - Provides information on how children view death and gives advice and tips on helping children cope with their death.
• Dealing With Death - Explains symptoms and signs of children dealing with grief and ways in which parents can help to identify what is healthy and what is not.

Counselor/Health Professional

Use the Internet information linked below to answer these questions specifically related to Counselor/Health Professional:

Questions for Grief Resources:
1. What are some resouces available to assist children and their parents through the grieving process?
2. Do you recommend that children join a peer support group to help them deal with their loss?

Quesions for Helping Children who are Grieving:
1. What are some steps for helping children through the grieving process?
2. What influences the grieving process?
3. When do you recommend families seek professional help for their children in dealing with loss or death?
4. Who do you recommend we contact to treat symptons of depressing?
5. What was your relationship between you and the person who passed away?
6. Have you had any unusual experiences during the grieving process and was your loss expected or unexpected?
7. Do you have a strong support system to help you through your grieving?

Questions for Hospice Net:
1. What are some ways you can avoid communicatin barriers between ourselves and children?
2. Should I have my child visit the dying?
3. What are some needs of a grieving child?
4. Should I force my child to go to a funeral?

• Grief Resources - Site of available resources to assist parents and children in obtaining information and on support groups that are available in dealing with bereavement.
• Helping Children who are Grieving - Doctors overview of symptoms, treatment, and prevention of children who have experienced the death of a loved one.
• Hospice Net - To help counselors find assistance through hospice for bereavement counsoling for families.

Society

Use the Internet information linked below to answer these questions specifically related to Media:

Questions for Informatin About Children and Grief:
1. What is complicated grief and name some categories that contribute to it?
2. What are some myths associated with grief and loss?

Questions for Death and Dying:
1. What is society's concept of death?
2. Is society's view of death moral or academic?
3. How can you change society's view of death from a fearful experience to one of peace?

• Information About Children and Grief - Definition of complicated grief, what contributes to it, and activities to assist children dealing with it and myths of griefs and losses.
• Death and Dying - Society's view of death and dying. Gives different cultural views of death.

Phase 3 - Debating, Discussing, and Reaching Consensus

You have all learned about a different part of Children Dealing with Death. Now group members come back to the larger WebQuest team with expertise gained by searching from one perspective. You must all now answer the Task / Quest(ion) as a group. Each of you will bring a certain viewpoint to the answer: some of you will agree and others disagree. Use information, pictures, movies, facts, opinions, etc. from the Webpages you explored to convince your teammates that your viewpoint is important and should be part of your team's answer to the Task / Quest(ion). Your WebQuest team should write out an answer that everyone on the team can live with.

Phase 4 - Real World Feedback

You and your teammates have learned a lot about death and dying and how a child learns to deal with grief. Here are some ways that you can find outside assistance with coping mechanisms with grief.


1. Take a survey on peoples experience with death.
2. Interview a funeral director about how children react to death and experiences he/she has observed. How does he/she deal with the children?
3. Speak with a counselor or attend a support group for bereavement.
4. Make a collage of pictures to help a child deal with the loss of a loved one?
5. Make a brochure for parents on how to deal with a child's grief.

Your Contact is: the designated contact

Conclusion

If children are given the message that dying is ok to talk about they will feel free to ask questions and will cope better when confronted with the death of a loved one. 'Kids face death naturally if adults allow it.' If you prepare them they will handle it better. Allow a child to grieve. Nothing is as important as your love, care, and understanding. Together you can find comfort in your sense of loss and help your child to heal through the grieving process.